How Many More Years Until You Leave excerpt how many more years are going to go by before you finally leave? been threatening to take off for so long now that I’m starting to feel deceived all of this talkin’ with no walkin’ has got me wondering what’s up your sleeve all the anthropomorphic bunny slippers of fate are looking for a reprieve how many more years are going to go by before we finally go? why we hang around a place that brings us down apparently, I do not know all those announcements of our impending departure I sure hope weren’t just for show I replaced the lights in all of the exit signs just to direct us to their glow...

The Captain Has Abandoned Ship the captain has abandoned ship (boat’s still floating, what’s his problem?) he says he knows that it’s time to quit (swansong, humbug!) when what used to bring uplifting joy (what a loony, what’s his problem?) now just leaves him sad and annoyed (yeah, he says that,) speaking about the crew, you know I really can’t complain I’m ever so thankful for all the sacrifices they have made (for a share of next to nothing) but every time I look away they grab a hold of the wheel and change course yeah, it hurts that whenever I turn my back they grab a hold of the wheel and change course (we know what he wants more than him) the captain has abandoned ship (what’s his problem? boat’s still floating) he says his heart’s just no longer in it (swansong, humbug!) having sailed now for over a decade (how pathetic, what a weirdo) with all the crew rarely getting paid (yeah you said it) I wouldn’t complain about the fact we rarely got anywhere I’m still thankful for all the experiences the crew and I shared (swansong, humbug!) but every time I go and hide they grab a hold of the wheel and change course and if I ever have the gall to complain they go and put false words in my mouth (look who’s spewing weak metaphors) the captain has abandoned ship (yeah whatever, what’s his problem?) he says that he has sailed his last trip (swansong, humbug!) having become too eager to please (what a loony) while sailing over indifferent seas (what the hell does that even mean?) wasn’t supposed to be the destination was always supposed to be about the journey but over the years I feel something has become increasingly tainted deep inside me the only thing to bring a feeling of self-worth has spoiled and become rotting baggage now so I’ve got to abandon all I’ve ever had, got to start again, find something new somehow if I can just find a way to ignore all the paranoia nagging in my head if I can just find a way to ignore all this sadness that’s corroding my soul I’ve got to find a way to ignore all the nagging doubts screaming in my head I’ve got to find a way to dispel all this paranoia raging in my head (what a loser, what a loony, how pathetic, such a failure, what a waste of a human being, swansong humbug, what a loony, such a failure, how pathetic, what a waste of a human being, what a weirdo, swansong humbug, yeah whatever, what a loony, swansong humbug!)

Perceptions I like the way that you infer my friends think I’m not very bright her kind words for him seem to infer I don’t deserve to have a life I used to wonder about the accuracy of my perceptions whenever I phone anyone they seem anxious to get me off of the line seems so many people I’ve known have changed their numbers or moved and neglected to tell me I used to wonder about the accuracy of my perceptions expression on his face, the way he turns away, it’s clear he’d rather I not be here at the end of the show I turned around to go and noticed everyone else had already left I used to wonder about the accuracy of my perceptions I used to wonder about the accuracy of my perceptions whenever I phone anyone they seem anxious to get me off of the line don’t apologize for not returning my calls, since when does anybody return my calls I used to wonder about the accuracy of my perceptions seems so many people I’ve known have changed their numbers or moved and neglected to tell me expression on his face, the way he turns away it’s clear he’d rather I not be here I used to wonder about the accuracy of my perceptions

Too Good To Be True letting me slip through your fingers would be a big mistake but if you're crazy enough to pass me by well that's your choice to make I don't understand how you could turn me down can't you see that I am the most awesome guy in town? I can't understand why you would turn me down don't you know that I'm the most amazing guy around? you say that you're not interested how could that be the case when the best deal you'll ever get is staring you in the face? how could you turn down an offer too good to be true? you really should be more thankful that I'd be willing to settle for you I don't understand how you could turn me down don’t you know that I am the most awesome guy in town? I can't understand why you would turn me down can’t you see that I'm the most amazing guy around? of course I'd keep you satisfied because I am the best once you've stepped into my clutches you will forget the rest not just that, but as you know I'm great to look at too I was even willing to overlook the fact I'm much better looking than you I don't understand how you could turn me down can't you see that I’m the most amazing guy in town? I can't understand why you would turn me down don't you know that I am the most awesome guy around? how could you turn down an offer that's too good to be true? you really should be more thankful that I'd be willing to settle for you

Your Friend On A Half Sunny Day pass by your house on a half sunny day shall I disturb you today? pass by your house on a half sunny day shall I disturb you today? pass by your house on a half sunny day shall I disturb you today? the sun is half shining today there’s a sickly hand knocking at your door come out and play there’s a sickening voice behind your door come out and play there’s a sickly hand knocking at your door come out and play the sun is half shining today please go away and leave me alone please go away there’s nobody home I’m not home, please go away bother somebody else for a change get on somebody else’s nerves please go away and leave me alone

Too Self-Absorbed For Romance Perhaps second night, exhibit of the equine statues you caught my eye, the way that the powdery tint in your hair and shoulders that made you look just like an exquisitely gorgeous work of art to me thought crossed my mind, could you maybe please save me from the beckoning of Princess Unobtainabelle but gazing at you, the look you gave back said I’m not welcome, “go away, deflect your eyes to crimson foot instead” and yes I know that I am not worthy and yes I know that`s a self-fulfilling prophecy and yes I am all too aware that my self-pity is really just self-serving bringing my problems all on to myself while searching for a solution to irrelevance so why am I feeling the need to justify myself? third night, the tavern where the royal lutenist found himself fighting a quirky battle with his scarf thought I might have glimpsed you in the crowd but couldn’t risk getting on your nerves and getting the same look again the table to myself was starting to get on my nerves pointing to my troubles of mingling with earth creatures so I left early, to check out senescent circle but over the viaduct I found myself pondering even though I`m not the monster you might fear me to be, I`m still not the person that I wish I was it wasn't my intention to make you feel ill at ease as my need for connection sabotaged itself yet again and yes I know that I am unworthy and yes I know that`s a self-fulfilling prophecy and yes I know that once again I`m really just being fed up with myself and yes I know I’m part of this world somehow but still no idea what the hell I am doing here and so I hereby present to the world a gift of my whimpering packaged as art while hopelessly yearning or softly lusting and nobody else has a clue what I’m going through and yes I know that anyone could relate to that

The Ill One endless echoes of past inertia fueled failures keep repeating like sound caught in a decaying delay oh a decaying time loop that just keeps on haunting me so for just how long now have I been frozen in entropy? I watched you from a safe distance long enough for you to become a panacea I too desperately needed intense enough that now I fear I may have become oh a metaphorical projectile you thankfully dodged and it cuts into me like some sort of cutting utensil irritates me like an unimaginative simile how I wish there was something I could give you to make you want to be with me how I wish there was something I could give you to make you fall in love with me how I wish there was something I could give you to make you want to complete me how I wish there was something I could give you to make you want to repair me not a compliment so much as a mistaken missing piece to somehow make me at bit less incapable of functioning maybe everything wouldn’t have been so confusing if I ever had any idea at all how to human but when I saw the friendly smile of an impossible future waving to me from the other side of the street oh I got too excited and walked too fast I got too excited and walked right past how I wish there was something I could give you to make you want to be with me how I wish there was something I could give you to make you fall in love with me how I wish there was something I could give you to make you want to repair me how I wish there was something I could give you to make you want to heal me...

Nothing a blinding light kept me awake last night a glaring light kept me awake last night nobody knows anything about my life nobody really knows my side of the story the other day when you gave me a ride to the office of identity licensing I had the chance to tell you all that’s been on my mind but of course by then, it was all really nothing

Saccharine Love Song (Third Wheel Sings) there’s something about how the way the shape of your face perfectly complements your facial expressions as you express your values and wisdom that inspires me to strive to become a better person and makes me want to hold your hand and gaze longingly into your eyes and inquire of any possibility that you’d maybe like to come over to my place and watch Bugs Bunny cartoons with me there’s something about how the way you stand filled with compassion and confidence that makes my loins tingle but the way you look into his eyes makes it all too clear that you’re not single but how can I hold it against him when I find that he’s so disarmingly sweet charming and kind I guess it would be worse if he was an undeserving jerk but as far as I can tell you have chosen well and there is no shame in losing to the best I guess there’s something about how the way the shape of your face perfectly complements your facial expressions as you express your values and wisdom that inspires me to strive to be a better person and makes me want to hold your hand and gaze longingly into your eyes and inquire of any possibility that you’d maybe like to come over to my place and watch Infinity Train with me there’s something about how the way you stand filled with compassion and confidence that makes my loins tingle but the way you look into his eyes makes it all too clear that you’re not single but how could I hold it against you when I find that he’s so disarmingly sweet charming and kind I’m not a total jerk, but I do have my quirks and I’m not really sure if I’d even be worth the effort it can be too easy to sink into jealousy but that’s not a place where I would like to be and I feel if more people were like you and him this world would be such a better place to live in but although I must confess he does look good in that dress he doesn't quite move me the way that you do

...how many more years are going to go by before I just go away saying that I`m leaving here any minute now day after day after day I keep going on about my lack of allegiance but still I never do stray we`re all aware these hopeless berries of curvature won’t even get in the way how many more years are going to go by before you finally leave? been threatening to take off for so long now we`re all starting to feel deceived all this talkin’ with no walkin’ it makes you wonder just what’s up my sleeve butterflies are caught in the deafening cobwebs all this inertia weaved...

Reel reel me in then push me away, then reel me in then push me away, then reel me in then push me away, then reel me in then push me away, then reel me in then push me away, then reel me in then throw me away, then lure me back then push me away, then reel me in then push me away... all the other fishes seem to jump out of the water just to say hello to you you seem to know them all, you’re happy to see them but you don’t seem to want them at the moment so you let them fall back into the water but I’m the one caught on your line I’m pleasantly perplexed by that I’m the one impaled on your hook you just can’t decide if you want me or not so you reel me in then push me away, then reel me in then push me away, then reel me in then push me away, then reel me in then throw me away, then lure me back, then push me away, then reel me in, then push me away, but that’s ok, because it flows both ways I’ve been swimming away while you’re reeling me in chasing after you when you push me away the cynical part of me wonders if maybe you’re right maybe our needs are just incompatible but my loyal clingy side only wants you and I know we’d both prefer it if I could somehow be more like a bird flying so freely through the air than like a kite caught in a windstorm but I feel oddly privileged to be on your line so I’m enjoying this back and forth feeling while I can before the line breaks, as you warned me it would, you warned me it would, you told me it would and sometimes you feel like a merry-go-round and although you’re making me awfully dizzy, I’m still in no hurry to get off of you until you want me to so reel me in then push me away, then reel me in then push me away, then reel me in then push me away, then reel me in, then push me away, then reel me in, then push me away, then throw me away, then push me away...